Le Tour De Iowa

In approximately 4 weeks, 6 days, and  20 hours we will converge for the 6th time to continue one of the greatest traditions ever created…the LE TOUR DE IOWA.   This event is so special and so divine that a lifelong member might consider it as an actual religion…or at least I do.  It provides all of us an opportunity to gather, drink, dance (sometimes in trash cans), sing, appreciate mother nature, and play in a world outside of our office settings and daily grind.  There are numerous greetings, high fives, yelling, praising, and overall good feelings during these four days that we should consider ourselves truly blessed.  We are back at full strength again this year (baring any ditch cleanup efforts) as everyone has committed to attend this year's Le Tour De Iowa.  These individuals have a common understanding of the importance of this event and it helps make for a fantastic four days in God's country.  One can only hope that time decides to stand still during this time to prolong the joy and laughter that all of us share.  

Most individuals that don't understand this event and our brotherhood would consider this time a waste of time, money and brain cells.  Someone once asked me what I really get from golfing on the Le Tour De Iowa every year and this is what I responded with: 

"I view this as a learning opportunity to further increase my overall quality of living.  I have come to understand and learn of so many of the world's greatest mysteries during the time I have spent on the Le Tour De Iowa.   For example, very few people have seen a human being actually giraffe eat leaves on a tree.  Think of how much you would pay to see this happen in normal everyday life?  Is $45 worth it?  Of course it is.  I know that windows transform and look like safety pads at 4:00am at night.  I know that caterpillars get angry when you name them Jason and put them in your mouth.  I know that small dog houses can fit a slightly overweight but nimble person.  I know that 3 people is the absolute max that can sleep under a pool table.  I know that an extremely flatulent individual actually effects all people around him and that smelling pure ammonia has an effect on your entire respiratory system.  I know that it is considered rude to tell someone that I hope that their helmet fits.  I know that marshmallows look like golf balls.  I know that it takes Geiken and Henry 6 hours and 10 minutes to play a round at the Legacy.  I know that boners…just happen.  Should I continue?  Let me ask you a question.  After hearing all of this, why wouldn't I golf on the Le Tour De Iowa?"